Readers and writers: Nonfiction recommendations for spring

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Five brave Black women … the stars … handwritten letters … finding self-worth. Here’s a gathering of nonfiction for your spring reading pleasure. Treat yourself after working in the garden — and enjoy.

“Please Write: Finding Joy and Meaning in the Soulful Art of Handwritten Letters”: by Lynne M. Kolze (Beaver’s Pond Press, $31.95)

(Courtesy of the author)

“Write a letter by hand? You’ve got to be kidding me. It’s faster to use the computer.”

So say many of us when the subject of letters written using pen and ink are mentioned in these days of hurried communication. Lynne M. Kolze, who lives in the Twin Cities, is here to tell us the benefits and surprising revival of this old form that she believes can stay vibrant even in this age of social media.

Lynne M. Kolze (Courtesy of the author)

“Letters represent love,” she writes. “Tidy, computer-generated letters leave me cold. They lack heart — the warmth, personality, charm, and playfulness of the paper letter. I have never found them to be quite as emotionally satisfying to write or receive. Letters remain special treasures because they are rare, deeply personal, one-of-a-kind creations that cannot be replaced if lost or destroyed.”

Kolze, who has written hundreds of notes and letters (four to six per month), believes the form benefits sender and receiver. She explains why letter writing is good for us, as well as pointing out how letters can be a learning laboratory, letter writing as spiritual practice, and how letters can save lives, encourage our development and, in the case of old letters, reveal our core truths. Weaving in her personal stories, she looks at letters of love and sympathy, letters that hurt and those that heal. She calls on us to teach a new generation about the satisfactions of letter writing not found at a computer.

Kolze spent her career in public service as an environmental planner for the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency, later working for the Minnesota Pollution Control Agency.

Although this book is pricey, it’s physically appealing, printed on heavy paper with color and black-and-white photos and illustrations. By the time you finish it you might want to dig out that pretty stationery and write the letter you’ve had in your head for a long time. Lynne Kolze assures you it will bring unexpected rewards.

“My Song, Unleashed”: by Marnie Dachis Marmet (Publish Her, $13-$19 depending on place of purchase)

When Marmet was 6 she was told she had a “raspy” voice, which embarrassed her so much she mostly didn’t do much speaking as a child. Her memoir is about how she went from childhood quiet to becoming a mature woman who trusts her instincts. She writes of her dad being in alcohol treatment, living in Israel with her husband, the births of three children and finding confidence and friendship with other women through various kinds of yoga and meditation. It was at a yoga retreat where she had a personal epiphany so many women need these days.

Marnie Dachis Marmet (Courtesy of the author)

“I reclaimed my sense of self, the part of me that had been hidden away as I took on the role of mother and wife,” she writes. “I needed to find balance and manage both. I also realized I could adjust my expectations and exceed them in a way I hadn’t imagined… I had set out for relaxation, pool time and yoga, and I had gained so much more. I was reawakened. I was reminded of how much I loved adventure and deep discussions and meeting new people through shared experiences. All I’d needed was a reframe and a mindset shift. I renewed the importance of self-care and committed to taking this knowledge home with me.”

There were still times when Marmet got a little off-balance with worry, especially when she started her own business. But now she is a serial entrepreneur, board-certified health coach and founder of Zenful Life Coaching as well as co-creator and co-host of “The Art of Living Well” podcast.

“Enslaved, Indentured, Free”: by Mary Elise Antoine (Wisconsin Historical Society, $24.95)

(Courtesy of Wisconsin Historical Society)

Subtitled “Five Black Women on the Upper Mississippi, 1800-1850,” this is the history of free and enslaved women who come together in Prairie du Chien, Wis., written by the president of the Prairie du Chien Historical Society.

Using legal documents, military records, court transcripts, personal correspondence, and interviews with the women’s descendants, Antoine weaves a narrative showing the relationships between these women whose children and great-grandchildren would be of Native American, French Canadian and Black heritage

Marianne (1769-1816) was a free woman of many talents, mother of 12 children whom she raised on a farm she owned. She seems to have been a remarkable woman who was proud of her free status. Mariah (1800-1829) and Patsey (1800-1880) were born into slavery and when they arrived at the prairie they were listed as free, but were forced to sign papers that made them indentured, binding them to their enslavers for many years. (Although the Northwest Ordinance of 1787 made slavery illegal in the territory, this was a way for enslavers to keep their human property.)

Maria eventually purchased her freedom and Patsey gained freedom for herself and her children when her enslaver died. Courtney (1812-1835) and Rachel (1814-1834) were born into slavery and brought to the upper Mississippi by U.S. Army officers transferred from Fort Snelling to Fort Crawford at Prairie du Chien. The two women eventually filed freedom suits and won.

Mary Elise Antoine (Courtesy of Wisconsin Historical Society)

Minnesota plays a part in this story because of the influence of officers at Fort Snelling. There’s an appearance by Joe Rolette, who would later make his way to Minnesota and hide the document that would have moved the capital from St. Paul to St. Peter, as well as others with connections to this state.

Despite telling the story of lives on the Upper Mississippi River Valley in an era when all the enslaved should have been free, the book’s uplifting last chapter is about these women living free in Prairie du Chien. “The stories of Marianne, Mariah, Patsey, Courtney, and Rachel help to create a fuller picture of life in Wisconsin in the early 1800s,” the author writes. “But, perhaps more importantly, they add five inspiring narratives of hope, perseverance, and triumph to this chapter of our state’s, and nation’s, history.”

“Enslaved, Indentured, Free” was published in 2022 and received a Benjamin Franklin Award in Regional History from the Independent Book Publishers Association, a Midwest Independent Publishers Association award and the Wisconsin Historical Society Board of Curators Book of Merit award.

This book is so worth reading. Hats off to Antoine for bringing old records to life as we take a bittersweet journey with these women.

“Stars: A Month-by-Month Tour of the Constellations” by Mike Lynch (AdventureKEEN, $14.95)

(Courtesy of the author)

“Say goodbye to the great constellations of winter, like Orion and his surrounding cast of characters, but say hello to more comfortable stargazing!”

That’s Mike Lynch’s advice for those who take a “star hike” through this month’s heavens in the second edition of his fact-filled. oversized paperback with sky charts showing the constellations for each month.

Lynch, whose Skywatch column is published in the Pioneer Press, writes in a friendly voice as he highlights the 27 constellations you can find throughout the year, offers tips for locating objects in the night sky and shares stories and myths behind the constellations. Lynch is an astrophotographer who has taught classes and guides tours of the stars.

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How Gen Zers made the crossword their own

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30-Across: “___ and dry food (categories I will now be using to describe human food. Oh, so suddenly it’s weird?)”

31-Across: “TikTok videos of ‘Family Guy’ clips accompanied by Subway Surfers gameplay, e.g.”

26-Down: “Lili ___, one of the first trans women to receive gender-affirming surgery”

Who’s this “I” cracking jokes about WET food in the middle of a crossword clue? What is SLUDGE CONTENT doing inside a puzzle? How did we get to learn about Lili Elbe when the answer ELBE almost always refers to the German river?

Welcome to the crossword in the age of Gen Z. Clues require internet meme literacy. Solutions may reflect the identity of the person behind the puzzle. And the way they’re constructed can involve vibrant online forums in addition to scraps of paper.

Grids these days are often “diaristic,” said Paolo Pasco, 23, the winner of this year’s American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, the Super Bowl of crosswords. They can reveal clusters of personal obsessions or glimpses of an idiosyncratic sense of humor.

“That’s a big part of what got me into puzzles,” Pasco said. “This is an insight into the person’s brain who thought of that joke.”

It’s a noticeable shift from decades past, when crosswords were usually faceless, less a site for auteurism than a form of anonymous entertainment. But thanks to a variety of factors — rapidly improving technology to create puzzles, a much wider array of outlets eager to publish them and a push to celebrate new voices — constructors today are more inclined to express themselves in their work.

For Ada Nicolle, the constructor of those clues for WET, SLUDGE CONTENT and ELBE, which appear in a puzzle on her blog Luckystreak Xwords, discovering a love of crossword construction happened in tandem with coming out as a transgender woman. Nicolle, 22, who lives in Toronto, said she chose her first name in part because it appeared in crosswords so frequently — over 600 grids in The New York Times alone.

Now she puts ADA in her own crossword puzzles.

Ada Nicolle, a crossword creator whose grids often include things relevant to Gen-Z solvers, in Burlington, Vt., on April 10, 2024. A younger generation of constructors is using an old form to reflect their identities, language and world. (Kelly Burgess/The New York Times)

Seeing a piece of information in a puzzle lends it a kind of authority, Nicolle said, which means she can use her puzzles to depict the way she wants the world to be.

“You see a bunch of news stories about these bills being passed about trying to take away your right to existence,” she added, “and if you’re solving a crossword puzzle and you see ‘gender euphoria’ in the grid as a matter-of-fact thing that people feel, it’s incredibly powerful.”

This isn’t the first time the crossword has undergone a youthquake. In the 1970s and 1980s, the crossword entered a period known as the Oreo Wars. The old guard insisted that pop-culture references and brand names should not appear in the venerable grid, and thus words like OREO had to be clued with their strict dictionary definitions. (“Oreography” is an alternate spelling for the study of mountains.)

Paolo Pasco, winner of the 2024 American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, in Brooklyn on April 9, 2024. A younger generation of constructors is using an old form to reflect their identities, language and world. (Frankie Alduino/The New York Times)

But younger constructors and editors, like Times crossword editor Will Shortz, argued that banning brand names from the puzzle meant leaving out major parts of contemporary life. By opening the crossword’s gates to more types of words and styles of wordplay, these editors reasoned, the form itself would become more capacious, inventive and, well, more fun.

Many Gen Z crossword enthusiasts point to the pandemic as the start of their obsession: Bored in high school or college, they were suddenly isolated and on the internet for a lot more time than ever before.

In the summer of 2020, Pasco, then an undergraduate student at Harvard, constructed a puzzle with Adam Aaronson, who was at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, over dozens of Twitter DMs. They had met online earlier that year, after Pasco complimented Aaronson on a clever clue.

When their puzzle ran in the Times that August, it was the first time the paper had published a collaboration by constructors born in the 2000s. According to XWord Info, a database that aggregates information about every printed New York Times crossword, of the 68 constructors who have made their Times crossword debuts as teenagers, more than two dozen have been Gen Z.

Since then, more bespoke platforms have cropped up for constructors. In 2021, Aaronson, now a 22-year-old software engineer in New York, unveiled his own app, Wordlisted, which scrapes any given list of words to find specific letter patterns. It’s free, though users can leave Aaronson a tip for his troubles. (“Tipping out $10 for each puzzle Wordlisted helped me get published so far,” wrote one person who sent Aaronson $100.)

Paolo Pasco holds his first place trophy from the 2024 American Crossword Puzzle Tournament, in Brooklyn on April 9, 2024. A younger generation of constructors is using an old form to reflect their identities, language and world. (Frankie Alduino/The New York Times)

Many of the top Gen Z constructors have at least basic coding knowledge; several mentioned generating “baby Python scripts” to help them hunt for specific letter or theme combinations.

Such expertise, though, is hardly required for entry into this tight-knit group. In forums like Crosscord, a Discord server for crossword enthusiasts, people share advice for constructing puzzles and tips for solving them.

“Once people started talking to each other online and understanding how crosswords worked, they realized of course we can do those things,” said Ricky Cruz, 26, who started the forum in 2019 and watched it take off during the pandemic. Today, it has some 4,000 members, who can dip into channels like “spoilers” (to discuss the day’s puzzles), “crossword solving” or “crossword construction,” where people test out themes and grids. In another channel, users can plug their work or link to Twitch streams of themselves solving a puzzle in real time.

Often, “crossword all-stars” will drop in, Aaronson added, so it is not a purely Gen Z space. But it’s these forums’ youngest members who drive the online conversation. They’re often the source of niche crossword-related memes, which then frequently find their way into puzzles on Et Tu Etui, a blog whose name is borrowed from an in-joke for the kind of obscure “crosswordese” that most editors today would never permit.

Like many trends, this one loops back around to its source. As many young people discover a love of crossword puzzles — sometimes with the help of these Gen Z-founded resources — they’re finding community within pages of newsprint.

A copy of “A to Gen Z Crosswords” by Ada Nicolle, a creator whose grids often include things relevant to younger solvers, in Burlington, Vt., on April 10, 2024. A younger generation of constructors is using an old form to reflect their identities, language and world. (Kelly Burgess/The New York Times)

Before the pandemic, most college newspapers either didn’t have a crossword puzzle, or they licensed ones from mainstream publications. But as crosswords have exploded across the internet, students have taken their own spin on the form. Dozens of student papers, like The Daily Princetonian and The Chicago Maroon, now feature regular full-fledged puzzle sections with games editors and staff constructors.

“It’s something I didn’t feel at all before, but now, online, at our school, through other schools, I have a crossword community,” said Pavan Kannan, 20, the crossword editor at The Michigan Daily.

As more members of Gen Z seize the means of crossword production, some are feeling emboldened.

“I feel like my generation is a lot smarter than people give us credit for,” said Nicolle, whose book “A-to-Gen Z Crosswords: 72 Puzzles That Hit Different,” is slated for release next month. “There should be hard crossword puzzles for people like me that are funny and the references are current and they’re nostalgic toward the 2000s and early 2010s. You sometimes solve a puzzle and you think, I didn’t know this could be put in a puzzle.”

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Skywatch: A memorable solar eclipse trip

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Despite the clouds around here for the solar eclipse earlier this month, I hope some of you had a chance to see at least some of the solar eclipse. I was one of the millions who jumped into the car and traveled to the band of totality. I put nearly 1,700 miles on my van and drove through numerous early road construction projects, but it was so worth it! Our original plan was to drive to Corsicana, Texas, south of Dallas, but the weather forecast was just too dicey. So we drove to Cape Girardeau, Missouri, but were blown away by the crowds. There were so many people that cellphone service was nearly impossible. We managed to get a less-than-desirable motel room about 40 miles southeast of Cape Girardeau near the Kentucky border.

(Mike Lynch)

The next morning, we were up at 3:30. We drove through a dense fog north on I-57 and settled in the little town of Anna, Illinois. They have a huge city park, and we were the first people there. We found a perfect spot near the tennis courts. Gradually, we were joined by other eclipse chasers, but it was far from hoards across the Mississippi River in Cape Girardeau. The fog lifted, and the skies became absolutely clear. I had all my specially equipped telescopes and cameras ready.  At 12:42, the moon’s disk made its first contact with the lower right side of the sun. For the next hour and 16 minutes, as the moon slid across the sun, daylight eerily faded, and the temperature dropped about 10 degrees. At 1:58, totality began with the stunning “diamond ring” effect as the last of the sun’s disk was eclipsed.

Attempting to put into words the four minutes and four seconds of totality is a challenge, but I’ll try my best. The experience was overwhelming, with some people yelling and others, like me, shedding tears. The sun’s outer atmosphere was in clear view, subtly and slowly changing shape. What was truly surprising was that even with the naked eye, we could see bright pink prominences arcing above the sun’s surface. I was incredibly fortunate to capture a photograph of them. The skies were dark enough in the vicinity of the eclipsed sun that stars were visible, including the bright planets Jupiter and Venus.

The author on the scene. (Mike Lynch)

The totality time passed all too quickly. As the moon’s disk began its retreat, we saw the diamond ring effect again. Shortly after, many folks around us were packing up and leaving, but we stayed until the very end, until the moon moved beyond the sun. Then, we joined everyone on the highway and started for home. Traffic was torturous, but the memory of what we witnessed made it much easier to take.

Unfortunately, the next total solar eclipse in the contiguous 48 states won’t be until 2045, but if you don’t mind a long plane ride, there will be many other total eclipses worldwide. Check out the NASA solar eclipse website. Personally, I’m interested in the one on Aug. 12, 2026, over portions of Iceland, Portugal, and Spain. I also would love to catch the one over Northern Alaska on March 30, 2033. You can watch a total eclipse by day and northern lights by night!  I have total solar eclipse fever! Can you tell?

Mike Lynch is an amateur astronomer and retired broadcast meteorologist for WCCO Radio in Minneapolis/St. Paul. He is the author of “Stars: a Month by Month Tour of the Constellations,” published by Adventure Publications and available at bookstores and adventurepublications.net. Mike is available for private star parties. You can contact him at mikewlynch@comcast.net.

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‘Is Minneapolis good?’ How a Russian transgender refugee found hope in Minnesota — and a friend at the airport

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Erik Georgievich Beda arrived at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport last month on a United flight from Chicago with nothing but a small plastic bag containing his Russian passport and other paperwork.

Beda, who knows only a few words of English, had no money. He hadn’t eaten for almost 24 hours. He arrived in snowy Minnesota wearing all the clothes he had: a button-down long-sleeve shirt, green hiking pants and hiking boots without shoelaces.

Erik Beda receives a bag of essentials from Travelers Assistance shortly after his arrival with just the clothes on his back March 22, 2024, at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport. The Johnston & Murphy store at the airport provided shoelaces to match his boots. (Courtesy of John Pundsack)

“When the plane landed in Minneapolis, I saw that there was a snowstorm outside,” Beda said through a translator. “It was very snowy and frosty. I had no warm clothes, no shoelaces, no food and no money. I decided that the airport police might be able to help me.”

Beda, 36, stopped the first airline employee he saw, and, using Google Translate, asked to be taken to “airport police.” He was instead brought to the Travelers Assistance station on Level D, where volunteers immediately began to help.

“At first, I tried to explain as best I could in English, but my pronunciation is very bad, and no one understood me,” Beda said.

Through a Russian interpreter, the Travelers Assistance staff learned that Beda, a transgender male, had fled Russia with his partner, Ivan Beda, because of the country’s widespread crackdown on LGBTQ+ people and outlawing of gender changes in identity and gender-affirming medical care.

“They are considered a terrorist and an enemy of the state,” said John Pundsack, a Travelers Assistance volunteer who befriended Beda at the airport. “Erik and Ivan were truly running for their lives.”

The couple left Russia on Dec. 23, flying to Istanbul and then on to Mexico City. After two months in Mexico, they crossed the border into Arizona and were detained there.

U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement would not keep Erik Beda in detention due to an inability to house a trans person, medical needs (hormones) and liability, Pundsack said.

Only Erik Beda was provided travel from Phoenix to Chicago to MSP. Ivan Beda is still being detained; he is now at the Folkston, Ga., ICE Processing Center.

Retired teacher, travelers’ assistant

When Beda arrived at MSP on March 22, Travelers Assistance staff called Pundsack to help. Pundsack, 57, worked past his normal “Go Guide” shift to make sure Beda got the help he needed, including food and water, said Travelers Assistance operations manager John Hewitt.

Pundsack, a retired teacher who lives in Woodbury, went to his car and got his blue Minnesota Twins sweatshirt for Beda to wear. He found a backpack in Lost and Found for Beda to use, found a shelter in Minneapolis that could take Beda for the night and organized an Uber to transport Beda to Christ Family Kingdom Center shelter at 6 p.m.

Volunteers and staff also provided a coat, sweatpants, cash, bathroom supplies and a SIM card for his phone.

“They renewed my hope in humanity,” Beda said. “They give me trust in people.”

Pundsack has been in daily contact with Beda since their first meeting.

“Saturday night I got a chance to chat with our young man and he is safe in a shelter,” Pundsack wrote in an email to Travelers Assistance staff on March 24. “He said he got a shower today and they even did his laundry. Such things we take for granted. He was so happy.”

Beda, Pundsack wrote, had been in contact with an immigration lawyer and an LGBTQ+ support group.

“I asked him if he has enough to eat, and his response was ‘Yes, and it’s tasty. I got fruit for dessert today,’” Pundsack wrote in his email. “It has been weeks since he has had fruit. Tonight we ended our conversation by him saying, ‘I think that nothing in life is accidental. Everything that happens is the necessary part of the plan. Some bad events turn out to be something good in the end.’ So now, hopefully, he can find his husband, and they can reunite and start life over.”

Pundsack and his husband, Joe Briol, and their neighbor, Katie Rust, have been helping Beda since his arrival. They contacted the Advocates for Human Rights on his behalf, and attorneys there are helping with his asylum case. They also helped schedule medical appointments, including an appointment with an endocrinologist. The dental clinic Pundsack uses, Grand Avenue Dental, donated the time and materials to fix Beda’s cracked molar.

Pundsack, Briol and Rust also have organized a GoFundMe fundraising page to raise money for the Bedas to pay for Ivan Beda’s legal fees. They are looking for an attorney in Georgia to take Ivan Beda’s case, so a bond can be set for his release.

Erik Beda has an asylum hearing set for April 2025. Rep. Ilhan Omar’s office reached out to him last week to offer assistance.

‘Is Minneapolis good?’

“As members of the LGBTQ community, Ivan and Erik faced persecution their whole lives together in Russia from family and neighbors,” according to the GoFundMe site. “They experienced physical attacks and eventually they were threatened with arrest by authorities who found out that Erik was trans. Both men are educated biologists who specialized in zoology. They owned a home in the country and raised cattle.”

Ivan Beda at the Durov Animal Theater in Moscow in October 2018. Ivan Beda worked at the circus/theater as a zookeeper. (Courtesy of Erik Beda)

The Bedas had to flee when authorities found out about the couple and issued an order for Erik Beda’s arrest, Erik said. They abandoned their farmstead and gave Manny, their beloved Australian cattle dog, back to the breeder.

“We were able to leave because the order for my arrest was issued in my former female name,” Erik Beda said. “But my documents, including my Russian passport, had already been changed, and we went unnoticed. A lot depends on luck.”

Beda said he barely got through customs in Moscow because he had masculinizing hormone therapy drugs with him.

“In Russia, testosterone preparations are equated to hard drugs,” he said. “You can go to prison for 10 years for them. Luckily, my endocrinologist did good paperwork for my medication — although she could pay for this with her position and freedom, so I was able to pass.”

The couple spent two months in Mexico City attempting to apply for asylum in the U.S. “We went every single day to request this appointment to seek asylum, and we were never granted an appointment,” Beda said. “We didn’t plan to stay in Mexico. Our goal was to get to the United States and receive protection. Only the United States could help in our situation.”

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Out of desperation, he said, they flew to Tijuana, Mexico, and then took a bus to Mexicali, Mexico. From there, they took a taxi to the border near the city of Yuma, Ariz., he said.

Near the border, while still in Mexico, the men were assaulted and robbed of all their money and possessions, Erik Beda said.

Both men were taken to a detention center in Yuma, but because they didn’t have any transgender beds, Erik Beda was put on a bus to Phoenix.

“He didn’t know anybody, but the volunteers at the tent city in Phoenix pooled their money to buy him a plane ticket to MSP,” Pundsack said. “Before they started their whole journey in Russia, they were looking at cities in the U.S. that were trans-friendly, and they learned about Minneapolis. So when they asked where he wanted to go, he said, ‘Is Minneapolis good?’”

Transition in Russia

Erik Beda grew up in Balakovo, Russia, and attended the Russian State Agrarian University-Moscow Agricultural Academy. He studied in the Faculty of Animal Engineering and met Ivan Beda in 2005 during a student activity day. They married in 2006.

They divorced six years later so that Erik Beda could begin his transgender transition. “In Russia, two men cannot be married, so we had to get divorced,” he said.

The next year, he went to St. Petersburg in order “to confirm a diagnosis of transsexualism,” he wrote in a seven-page document explaining his need for asylum.

The couple lived and worked in different cities in Russia, often working with animals at veterinary clinics and other places. The couple were physically attacked on numerous occasions and faced death threats and discrimination. “When my mother found out about my transition, she tried to kill me,” he said. “She hired people to ‘fix’ me.”

Erik Beda said he almost died one night in August 2013 when he was attacked, kidnapped and beaten by three masked men. The men kept Beda handcuffed in an abandoned factory without food, water or access to a toilet for a day and then let him go, he said. When he reported the crime to police, they refused to investigate, he said.

The couple moved to a small village and went into hiding for five years to escape the persecution, and Erik Beda said he stopped his official transition.

“It was a very difficult five years,” he said. “The general population and the government both have very negative views of the LGBTQ community. Since the war in Ukraine started, the negative interactions have intensified because the government is looking for, like, inside, you know, traitors, basically, and so that community has been targeted.”

The Bedas married again in 2019. Last year, they moved to Moscow, where Erik Beda passed a psychiatric commission and received a certificate in May 2023 with a diagnosis of transsexualism, he said.

“I immediately went to have my birth certificate changed, but I was told that I did not have the right to do this as long as Ivan and I were married,” he said. “They demanded that we dissolve our marriage because after changing the documents, the marriage would officially become same-sex, and this is prohibited. But it was about saving my life, so we had no choice. We believed that the opportunity to make a transgender transition and be myself was more important to me than a marriage stamp in our passports.”

In June 2023, he underwent a double mastectomy. A month later, Russia passed a law banning gender reassignment. The law prohibits individuals from changing their gender on official documents, including passports and identity cards.

Gay rights activists hold a banner reading “Homophobia – the religion of bullies” during a protest on Red Square in Moscow, Russia, on July 14, 2013. Russian lawmakers on June 14, 2023 approved in first reading a bill outlawing gender-affirming medical care and changing gender in official documents in a blow to Russia’s already beleaguered LGBTQ+ community. (AP Photo/Evgeny Feldman, File)

“If they find out that you’re transgender, they will do conversion therapy and then consider you as someone that’s spreading propaganda, and for that, you would be put in jail,” he said. “If you are part of an LGBTQ community, you are now being listed as part of an extremist group.”

Fortunately, he said, a few days before the new law went into effect, he was able to change all of his documents to “Erik Beda.”

Beda said the couple’s landlord knew he was transgender and reported him to the authorities. “We knew that I was on a list and could possibly be arrested,” he said.

Police left an envelope at the couple’s house at the beginning of October 2023 with a summons for Erik Beda to appear before the Investigative Committee on Nov. 11.

“Then I realized that there was nothing to wait for, and if I didn’t leave Russia now, I would be illegally convicted and I would serve a prison sentence on a fabricated case,” he wrote. “I was in a panic and didn’t know what to do. Ivan and I realized that the only way to escape persecution was to leave Russia.”

Because the arrest warrant was in his “dead” name and his passport was in his new name, “they didn’t put two and two together at customs as I was leaving,” he said. “They didn’t have time to get the updated documents on the arrest warrant. I was very lucky.”

Divorce adds peril

Because the couple isn’t married, Erik Beda is terrified Ivan Beda will be sent back to Russia. He is praying that someone will step up and agree to be Ivan’s sponsor.

“His interview about the validity of his fears of persecution may not be approved due to the fact that our marriage has been dissolved,” Erik Beda said. “If this happens, he will be deported back to Russia. But if a sponsor is found, Ivan will be immediately released without an interview, and we can get married again. Then our application for asylum will become common to both of us, and our trial will be in Minneapolis.”

The couple had hoped to remarry in Mexico, but they didn’t have the proper documentation, he said.

“We hoped to get married here legally as quickly as possible,” he said. “The divorce was not part of what we wanted. It was not part of our wishes.”

The couple talk every day by phone. The LGBTQ Freedom Fund provided money so that Ivan Beda can call each day from the detention center and talk for his allotted 5 minutes; Erik Beda, who is staying in a shelter in downtown Minneapolis, has found that the best cellphone reception for the calls is on Nicollet Island. Each call costs $3.95.

“I walk there every day,” he said. “We give each other updates on each other’s day and where we are headed. We don’t have a lot of time for much more. He can’t eat and can’t sleep. He’s very depressed. He is sad that we are not together.”

Kindness in Minnesota — and in immigration

Russian refugee Erik Beda, right, takes a photo of the Minnesota State Capitol dome as he and his friend John Pundsack, from Woodbury, tour the building on Wednesday. Beda said he can’t believe how kind the people of Minnesota are. (John Autey / Pioneer Press)

Erik Beda meets with Pundsack once or twice a week. They generally meet at the airport or the Capitol – places Beda can reach easily via light rail.

Pundsack, who taught fourth grade at Starr Elementary School in New Richmond, Wis., has worked to raise money for Erik Beda through friends and family.

Beda said he can’t believe how kind the people of Minnesota are. “All of this happening is very unusual,” he said. “I’m very grateful for it because in Russia, people don’t give you this kind of help. The people here are very nice and kind. I’ve been told they are that way because of the harsh winters.”

Beda said he was struck by the kindness shown at the immigration center in Yuma, too. The room had “transparent walls,” he said, and he was able to observe the officers working with newly arrived migrants.

“I saw wonderful things,” he said. “One migrant woman was extremely tired and could barely stand on her feet. She had a tiny baby in her arms. She couldn’t sign documents, couldn’t get anything out of her bags because she was holding her baby. She almost cried from powerlessness and fatigue.

“And then an officer approached her – a very tall, bearded man. He very carefully took the child from her arms and cradled him as if he were his own, staying next to this woman the entire time she underwent the necessary procedures. When she finished, the officer took her to the seating area, gave her the baby, and brought her food. This was an amazing example of humanity for me. I can’t imagine a Russian police officer treating a migrant’s child like that.”

He was shocked to discover that officials didn’t shave the heads of migrants who had lice. Instead, he said, the women’s hair was washed with a special shampoo and combed out with tiny combs.

“One woman had luxurious hair down to her lower back,” he said. “They found lice on her, and three medical staff combed and washed her hair for about two hours. This was the second incident that struck me to the core. Everyone was very patient, kind and professional. I say ‘thank you’ to them for their humanity.”

Beda credits Grand Avenue Dental with giving him the “the most wonderful experience I’ve ever had with a doctor,” he said. “In Russia, it’s not like that at all. There is very little pain medicine. They yank out rather than fix them. It looks like a brand-new tooth. It is amazing to see the difference.”

Pundsack said spending time with Beda has made him appreciate the little things in life.

“The two things he asked for the first day: ‘Do you think you could bring me dental floss and a nail clipper?’” he said. “I brought him an orange, and he called it a dessert. This whole experience has just taught me to appreciate everything that I have. It’s just, like, ‘Wow, look at this.’”

Hoping to settle here

Beda is hoping that he and Ivan Beda will eventually be able to live together in an apartment or house in Minneapolis. “It would be nice to have a place to live – that would be a dream,” he said.

Ivan Beda will need to work with an attorney in Georgia and prove his case at a credible-fear hearing and a bond hearing, Pundsack said. No court date has been set.

“If you had asked me about this three weeks ago, I would not have had a clue about any of this,” Pundsack said. “Normally, when you’re a travel assistant, you’re helping people with things like, ‘Oh, you’re at Gate G, you go down this way.’”

He said his late mother, Irene Pundsack, who died in February 2021 at the age of 94, would be proud.

“It’s what my mom would do,” he said. “She helped a lot of homeless people. Her house in St. Cloud was donated to a group that helps people who are unhoused. That’s why I think I’m having all this success. She’s looking down and saying, ‘You help him. You help him.’”

Erik Beda wants people to know that the situation in Russia for the LGBTQ+ community is “catastrophic,” Pundsack said.

“He knows – and people in Russia know – that Minnesota is one of the best places to be transgender or gay,” he said. “That is why he came here. He knows if he goes back to Russia, he’ll be dead. We’re doing all we can to keep him safe.”

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