Sarah Green Carmichael: Elon Musk allegations are a reminder that harassment is about power

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Imagine you are completing the annual training module for preventing sexual harassment at work.

How would you answer the following questions?

1. You, a top executive, find yourself attracted to a summer intern. Is it OK to ask her for a date?

2. Is it appropriate to offer a contract employee an extravagant gift — a horse, for example — in exchange for sex? If she refuses, can you reduce her hours?

3. You are the CEO of the company. Would it be acceptable to ask one of your employees, repeatedly, to have babies with you?

If you answered “no” to all of these questions, congratulations — you pass. If you answered yes to all of them, well, maybe you’re Elon Musk.

The chief executive of several companies, including Tesla, Neuralink, X, the Boring Company, and SpaceX, Musk is alleged to have done all of these things by former SpaceX employees, according to reporting by the Wall Street Journal. And on Wednesday, eight former SpaceX engineers sued Musk for creating what they called “a pervasively sexist culture” — and for firing them when they complained about it. (A SpaceX representative called the Journal’s reporting “completely misleading;” Musk has denied the incident involving the horse; and the company has disputed that the employees were wrongfully terminated.)

Offering an employee anything in exchange for sex would be a clear violation of sexual harassment statutes, which prohibit such “quid pro quo” proposals. It’s also never acceptable to punish an employee for rebuffing your sexual advances — that’s called retaliation.

Although sexual harassment is often popularly portrayed as romance gone wrong — by a man who genuinely has a crush on a coworker, say — it would be more accurate to see it as a power play: a way of making very clear to women that this particular clubhouse is “boys only.”

That’s why companies where most employees are male, and where the culture venerates a kind of crush-or-be-crushed machismo, are associated with higher levels of harassment. Women are seen as interlopers, not colleagues. The harassment isn’t so much because the men are immature “frat boys” (frankly, an insult to actual frat boys). Nor is it really about men being attracted to women. It’s about who really deserves these jobs. The goal of the harassment is to make women’s work lives so unpleasant that they’ll leave. It’s a form of discrimination, which is why it’s illegal.

And although sexual relationships between consenting adults aren’t usually completely barred by company policy, corporate rules at SpaceX — as at many large firms — do prohibit them between bosses and subordinates.

But none of this appears to have stopped the powerful Musk from targeting women at his companies for sexual conquest.

CEOs get paid big bucks to follow the rules — their own, and the U.S. government’s. When they instead choose to flout them, it sends a message to the rest of the company.

And the message has been received, if we can judge by the many allegations of sexual harassment at Musk’s various companies. Even before the case filed last week, female employees at SpaceX and Tesla had sued over coworkers’ catcalling, unwanted touching and untrammeled misogyny. The behavior, the plaintiffs say, would worsen whenever the CEO issued one of his many off-color tweets. As one told Rolling Stone, “There are people in that factory who see (Musk) as a god. If he talks like that, they know they can, too.” Tesla has denied wrongdoing in several such lawsuits, and has sometimes reached legal settlements with plaintiffs.

To cope, the women say they would wear baggier clothes — but then they were harassed for that, too. One woman built a wall of cardboard boxes at her workstation, to try and hide. It didn’t help.

What does help? It’s really not, well, rocket science. Company cultures where harassment is less common feature the kind of leadership that Musk, and his various boards, so far have seemed unable to supply. They hire, promote, and retain women; they foster candid-yet-inclusive cultures; and they expect everyone, including the CEO, to treat employees and company policy with respect.

Musk, Time Magazine’s 2021 Person of the Year, is often portrayed as a business genius — a charismatic innovator who gets results. That image has been dented by his chaotic, value-destroying takeover of X, formerly Twitter, and slowing EV sales at Tesla. Did Musk’s companies succeed because of his erratic behavior, or in spite of it? It’s increasingly looking like the latter.

Musk, volatile though he may be, is no dummy. If you believe the latest allegations, he was self-aware enough to say, as he groped one woman, “I shouldn’t be doing this” and to another, that they should lie and say their sexual relationship didn’t start until she’d left the company. It’s hard to read allegations like these without a creeping feeling of nausea.

Also sickening: the way Musk reportedly used his sprawling corporate web to entangle his sexual targets, pulling them closer when he was interested and pushing them away when it suited him.

For example, Musk once allegedly lured an intern to dinner — he invited her to discuss her “ideas for improving SpaceX” before kissing her — then persuaded her to accept a senior role. She says it turned out to be a symbolic job with no real authority, sometimes leaving her so demoralized she’d hide in the bathroom. After she repeatedly rebuffed further sexual overtures, she was shunted aside. Other women say they responded to Musk’s business overtures in good faith, only to find their careers stalled after rebuffing his sexual advances. Harassment is about power, and Musk is one of the most powerful men in the world. This is how he’s chosen to wield his influence? You don’t have to ace your sexual harassment training to understand that’s no way to run a business — and certainly no way to treat another human being.

Sarah Green Carmichael is a Bloomberg Opinion columnist and editor. Previously, she was an executive editor at Harvard Business Review.

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Literary calendar for week of June 16

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ROGER BARR: Presents “Murder on the Hill,” nonfiction about the unsolved 1937 murder of Union Depot waitress Ruth Munson, whose body was found after a fire in an abandoned hotel. Using diaries and letters, newspaper accounts, public documents and other primary sources, Barr builds a picture of a secretive woman who was walking the edge of respectability. He also traces the history of Ramsey Hill, which began as a place for millionaires, fell on hard times, and later was reborn through regentrification. 7 p.m. Thursday, June 20, SubText Books, 6 W. Fifth St., St. Paul.

MINNESOTA MYSTERY NIGHT: Welcomes Jessie Chandler and Judy M. Kerr introducing their newest collaboration, “Million Dollar Hoodlums,” featuring two local crime writers trying to solve a 50-year-old cold case. Chandler, a former Minnesotan who lives in Oregon, is author of the Shay O’Hanlon Caper series. Her latest is “Shanghai Murder.” She is also a podcast co-host, a member of the national board of directors of Mystery Writers of America, an accomplished painter, and former vice president of the Twin Cities chapter of Sisters in Crime. Minnesotan Kerr is author of the MC McCall series featuring a U.S. Postal inspector. Her first books in the series are “Black Friday” and “Silent Service.” A retiree from the U.S. Postal Service, Kerr is also a professional editor and proofreader. 7 p.m. Monday, June 17,  Axel’s restaurant, 1318 Sibley Memorial Highway, Mendota. The program is free; paid dinner begins at 5:30 p.m. Reservations at 651-686-4840.

ALLISON PUGH: Presents “The Last Human Job” in conversation with Dr. Mani Mokalla. 7 p.m. Monday, June 17, Magers & Quinn, 3038 Hennepin Ave. S., Mpls.

READINGS BY WRITERS: Poets Mary Junge, Timothy Young, Mary Kay Rummel and Michael Bazzett read from their work during the last program until September. 7:30 p.m. Tuesday, June 18, University Club, 420 Summit Ave., St. Paul.

ROBERT SAMUELS: Discusses “His Name is George Floyd: One Man’s Life and Struggle for Racial Justice,” about challenges in the life of the man who “wanted to be somebody” and was murdered by a Minneapolis police officer. 7 p.m. Tuesday, June 18, Magers & Quinn, 3038 Hennepin Ave. S., Mpls.

Lisa See celebrates the paperback edition of her novel “Lady Tan’s Circle of Women” on June 20, 2024, at the Minneapolis Central Library, presented by Literature Lovers’ Night Out and Valley Bookseller. (Literature Loves’ Night Out/Valley Bookseller)

LISA SEE: Bestselling author discusses her latest novel, “Lady Tan’s Circle of Women,” now in paperback, about two women friends who want to help other women as midwives in training until one of them is married and forbidden from leaving the family compound. Presented by Literature Lovers’ Night Out and Valley Bookseller. 6 p.m. Thursday, June 20, Minneapolis Central Library, 300 Nicollet Mall, Mpls. (Doors open at 5:30 p.m.; priority will be given to those who come earlier.)

KIM UY: Discusses “Chasing Dreams: Becoming a Doctor,” an English-Khmer bilingual graphic memoir that starts and ends in Cambodia about a girl who will inspire readers to hold onto their dreams. Part of Our Stories Carried Us Here series. 7 p.m. Thursday, June 20, Magers & Quinn, 3038 Hennepin Ave. S, Mpls.

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Literary calendar: Author celebrates paperback edition with St. Paul bookstore chat

Sunday Bulletin Board: There’s nothing like hitting that first home run!

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Life as we know it

ZOO LOU of St. Paul writes: “Subject: Babe Ruth and My First Home Run.

“It was the first Saturday in June of 1957, and I was pedaling my bike fast and furiously down Third Street on St. Paul’s East Side to Parkway Little League, not wanting to be late for the big day of tryouts.

“What I encountered at this field of dreams was a rambunctious group of 8- and 9-year-olds, brimming with the unbridled energy of wild horses, all vying for a spot on teams with such scintillating names as the Chicks, Robins, Vols and Owls.

“It was the commanding presence of Mr. Mincher, longtime leader and mentor at Parkway, and some volunteer dads who managed to get everyone registered and organized into groups.

“I started out in center, and almost immediately a wave of self-consciousness swept over me. Duct tape covered the holes in my tennis shoes, patches covered the holes in my jeans, and my glove was this overstuffed monstrosity that kept slipping off my hand. But when I caught two fly balls, my confidence soared.

“After patrolling the outfield, I was about to face my biggest test. There I was in the on-deck circle, nervous as all get-out. Suddenly, I remembered the stories my dad and uncles told me about Babe Ruth, the Sultan of Swat, the mighty Bambino, the greatest home run hitter of all time, stepping to the plate before 60,000 roaring fans at Yankee Stadium.

“I closed my eyes and imagined the Babe standing next to me. ‘Just relax, kid, and keep your eye on the ball,’ he said with a wink. ‘You can do it.’

“After some swings and misses, I was down to my last chance. Taking a deep breath, I glared defiantly at the pitcher, tightened my grip, and, with one Ruthian swing, drilled a hard liner to left field. Racing to first base, it felt like my tennis shoes, duct tape and all, were gliding above the ground. I was the happiest kid on the face of the Earth.

“Mr. Mincher patted me on the back and told me to stay alert and run the bases like a real game. A soft grounder got me to second, and a bloop fly got me to third. One base to go.

“Peering anxiously down the line, who did I see coming to bat but good friend Terry ‘Trucker’ Truhler. And he wasted no time belting a sinking liner to right. I took off for home like Jackie Robinson and jumped on the plate with a resounding ‘THUD’!

“‘I hit a home run! I hit a home run!’ I shouted over and over, pumping my fist in the air. ‘We did it, Babe!’

“Basking in the glow of my prodigious feat, I didn’t realize the other players were looking at me like I was some sort of nut. When I got home, I continued to boast about my home run, until all the kids, with equal parts amusement and sarcasm, explained to me what a home run really was. Needless to say, I felt pretty silly and embarrassed.

“But just to indulge a young (now very old) man’s fancy: I still truly believe I hit a home run that June day in 1957. And Babe Ruth was with me.”

See world

From ARDEN HILLS SWEDE (f.k.a. MOUNDS VIEW SWEDE): “I’ve been watching the pond near the front of our New Perspective Senior Living home in Arden Hills and was delighted one early-spring day to see the turtles all out and sunning themselves on a sunny day.

“The most I’ve counted at one time is 17, but another resident counted 18. I feel very fortunate to be in a place with a lot of nature nearby. so I can continue to get photos to share with Bulletin Board. I’ve been lax in actually sending them, but I hope to get more ‘with it’ now.”

Life (and possibly impending death) as we know it

JOHN IN HIGHLAND: “Subject: Aurora Borealis.

“There are days in every person’s memory that are so significant that one will never forget them. Recent sightings of the Aurora Borealis brought back such a memory for me.

“May 12, 1969, was the day that I was drafted into the U.S. Army. A group of 30 of us civilians got to shake hands with Mayor Tom Byrne at the St. Paul Armory before being bused to the train depot in Minneapolis. There we would await the start of a train ride to Fort Lewis, Washington.

“The train took 36 hours to reach the West Coast. I believe that it was the same train that was advertised as the ‘Vistadome North Coast Limited.’ Most of us took advantage of the dome car to watch the passing scenery. As the night grew dark across the fields of North Dakota, we were aware of a light show on the northern horizon. It was the first time I had ever seen the Northern Lights. The next day, the train made a brief stop in Havre, Montana. I took the chance to jump off and buy a newspaper. The headline read: ‘Nixon Announces Reduction of Troop Level in Vietnam’!

“On the third day, we pulled into the Seattle train depot, not knowing our fate, but wanting to get on with it.”

Please release me!

THE DORYMAN of Prescott, Wisconsin: “Subject: Long Lived The Queen Earworm.

“My little brain was playing ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ from 1 a.m. to the break of day, today:

“MOMMMAA, I CAN’T GET TO SLEEP!

“You’ve been playing in my head,

“Ever since I’ve gone to bed . . .

“MOMMMAA, I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

“I just toss and turn all night,

“Waiting for the morning’s light . . .

“Well, it goes on and on, but you get the picture.”

Everyone’s a critic! Architecture Division (including: There’s nothin’ like a simile!)

GRANDPA BOB reports: “Nine-year-old Sam, commenting on fast-food architecture, said: ‘I like the older McDonald’s. They look like a happy kid. The newer ones, the flat and dark ones, look like a depressed adult who doesn’t like their job.’”

The sign on the road to the cemetery said “Dead End” . . . Electronic Board of the Church on Lexington in Shoreview Division

Our Official Electronic Board of the Church on Lexington in Shoreview Monitor — RED’S OFFSPRING, north of St. Paul — reports: “Subject: Good advice.

“This is the most recent message on the electronic board of the church on Lexington in Shoreview:

“‘SMILE . . . HAPPINESS LOOKS

“‘GORGEOUS ON YOU’”

Now & Then

RIVERMOUSE: “I did something last night that I haven’t done since I was a kid — 70 years ago or so. I popped kernels in a saucepan on my stove.

“Turfman’s cousin Paul, thanking Turfman more than two years ago for the genealogy manuscript Turfman had emailed him, gave us the kernels from his farm, along with some homemade summer sausage and maple syrup, when we were in Sleepy Eye, Minnesota, for cousin Arnolda’s birthday party. We quickly devoured the summer sausage (it was better than Schmidt’s in Nicollet!) and syrup, but the popcorn just sat there over the years in its little plastic container while I munched on store-bought kernels popped in microwavable bags.

“Maybe two nights of thunderstorms, followed yesterday by a massive black cloud labeled ‘tornado watch’ speeding closely over the top of our house, inspired me to risk popping Paul’s kernels the way Mom used to pop ours (except Mom’s saucepan lid had a pan stirrer attached to its knob). In heated-till-it-shimmered slightly salted olive oil, I spread a single layer of kernels and lidded the pan. Much to this city girl’s amazement and delight, in less than a minute I heard a pop, and then another and another! Just like in the olden days. Lacking Mom’s stirrer lid, I lifted the pan slightly and shook it over the hot burner until the popping stopped. Then I lifted the lid: My pan was full of fluffy whites! Yum! No mystery ingredients and, after reheating the dozen laggards at the bottom, my layer yielded 100 percent edible.

“That was more than enough excitement for one day.”

The passing show

BILL OF THE RIVER LAKE reports: “While camping in Sauk Centre over the Mother’s Day weekend, we stopped at the local DQ for a treat. All went well, and just as we were leaving, the entire local high-school boys’ baseball team flooded in, taking up the whole store. There must have been 25 boys, all very hungry after winning their ballgame 12-1.

“I suggested to them that the winning pitcher and the player who hit a grand slam deserved a double treat.

“Pity the customers who arrived a minute after the players.”

CAUTION! Words at Play!

THE DRAGON LADY of Inver Grove Heights: “Here is a cute little story I like to tell about two brooms that were going to be married soon.

“One day, the bride broom said to the groom broom: ‘You know, I have something to tell you. We are going to have a little whisk broom.’

“The groom broom looked at the bride broom with astonishment. ‘Wha . . . what? Why, that’s impossible! We haven’t even swept together yet!”

Life as we know it

AUCTION GIRL writes: “Subject: AG does PT.

“Several lifetimes ago, Auction Girl left Pine Island and found a job at Little Store on the prairie. Actually, they were desperate for help during COVID. The manager hired her based on one call, and AG dreamed of running their mini-donut machine. Dang, no more mini-donuts made in store. But can ya bag groceries?

“OK. For the last several years, it’s been a blast. Getting up before dawn, cutting through snowfalls, rain, vacation-boat traffic and working from open till afternoon. You meet so many people and hear a lot of stories.

“AG felt a little off one day. She’d had a stroke. It was strangely like being exhausted, and feeling drunk. No fanfare or pain, just a weird disconnect from the world of balance.

“It ended up at a big hospital, and AG had to relearn to use a fork and other stuff. The customers at Little Store, their kids, the workers and of course Good Driver of St. Everywhere and family sent prayers, wishes, good vibes to her.

“Everything moves slower now. The sun still comes up. AG can still remember Pete Seeger’s song ‘Turn, Turn, Turn’ and hopes to be able to play it again and maybe sing, too.

“Please be aware of what a stroke may look like. Call 9-1-1 if you have or witness one.”

Life (and death) as we know it . . . Plus: The simple pleasures — and: The highfalutin displeasures (responsorial)

BIRDWATCHER IN LA CRESCENT: “Subject: Hello, again.

“It has been way too long since I have corresponded with Bulletin Board, but life got in the way.

“COVID came, and we all had to deal with that — some who received the ugly germ, and others who witnessed those people from afar.

“In 2021, my groom of 61 years fell while outside walking and suffered a traumatic brain injury and brain bleed. While in the hospital for 76 days, he then experienced having a pacemaker inserted, suffered a small stroke and a heart attack.

“The writing was on the wall: We have to move and get out of this large two-story house with all the stairs. So, we moved to a twin home with zero steps, out in the country of La Crescent. I said when we moved: Now I know why we had four children — so we would have help moving when we got old.

“Behind us is prairie restoration, with lots of wildlife to view. We kept saying, ‘Why didn’t we do this years ago?’ Oh yeah, twin homes weren’t built here years ago.

“My groom passed away late fall of 2023, so I am now learning a new life.

“My simple pleasure this spring has been that I bought a bluebird house after seeing a bluebird glide by. Within three days after I attached the house onto the side of the shed, Mr. and Mrs. Bluebird took up residency, and on Sunday during the all-day rain, they left their cozy confines.

“Last year we had sandhill cranes behind our home, and our daughter named then Frasier and Niles. They had two little fuzzy, yellow ones they brought for us to see, but one day there was only one, and the next day Frasier and Niles were alone — so sad, but that’s nature.

“I totally agree with TWITTY of Como: Music isn’t necessary for most documentaries — and if they think it is, how about turning the volume down so we can hear the commentator, whose voice should be louder than the music. I have closed-captioning on all the time, as my ears don’t hear as well as they should, even with hearing aids. And I don’t want to turn my volume up to my level of hearing, because I am sure the neighbors across the street don’t want to hear what I am watching.

“Thank you for all the BB entries. They are so enjoyable.”

BULLETIN BOARD SAYS: Thank you, ma’am. And welcome back!

BAND NAME OF THE DAY: The Overstuffed Monstrosities

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Swenson, Shah: The mental health of new dads needs attention, too

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This Father’s Day, we must confront a national reality – we are failing new fathers.

Though there has been increasing awareness of the mental health challenges faced by postpartum mothers, too often fathers are left behind. Approximately 1 in 3 fathers are at-risk for postpartum depression, and the risk is closer to 1 in 2 in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), where we work. Mental health symptoms are so common that some NICUs, including ours locally, have begun to systematically include fathers in routine mental health screening when their babies have prolonged hospitalizations. Unfortunately, significant gaps in screening fathers beyond the hospital and health coverage means their symptoms often go untreated.

Mentally healthy fathers improve father-baby interactions, infant development, and the emotional-behavioral health of younger children. As pediatricians who specialize in the care of critically ill newborns, we see firsthand the difficulty dads confront in balancing care for their babies and partners, often with little time off work. When fathers experience postpartum depression, the risk their partners will experience symptoms increases. We must remember that support for paternal mental health benefits moms, too.

Though the American Academy of Pediatrics has called for screening all parents whose infants require care in the NICU for postpartum depression, significant barriers exist. Pediatricians are not paid to coordinate mental health referrals for the large number of eligible parents they encounter. Battling the stigma of mental health issues, particularly for fathers, also takes a great deal of time that is uncompensated. Lack of routine screening for fathers after their babies go home from the hospital creates missed opportunities to normalize, educate, and connect fathers to treatment, leaving them and their young families to fend for themselves in a system where mental health care is increasingly hard to access.

Options are limited for fathers seeking mental health care, many of whom do not have insurance or primary-care physicians. While most states, including Minnesota, have extended Medicaid coverage to mothers for a year, no such provision exists for fathers. Extending to dads the same duration of Medicaid coverage after the birth of their newborns would be one large step state governments could make in caring for new fathers.

This Father’s Day, we should guarantee every dad access to mental health screening and the ability to receive treatment in their baby’s first year. The father’s health, baby’s health, and their family’s health will be better for it.

Dr. Sarah Swenson MD, DPhil, FAAP, is a Rhodes Scholar and neonatal-perinatal medicine fellow in Minnesota. Dr. Shetal Shah MD, FAAP, is head of the national Pediatric Policy Council. Both are members of the American Academy of Pediatrics.

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