Every year, as the days get shorter and the grocery stores start stacking canned cranberries into small architectural marvels, I cling to one simple dream: mowing my lawn on my birthday.

My birthday falls in late November, this year on the Saturday after Thanksgiving, a time when most people are busy pretending the snowblower looks like it should start just fine. There’s always that moment in the garage where you stare at it from a safe emotional distance, nodding reassuringly. “Yep. Looks healthy.” And yet you don’t dare pull the cord because deep down you know you’ll end up making sounds that resemble a small child weeping into a handkerchief.

But me? Every year, with unwavering conviction, when it’s time to blow out the candles, I don’t ask for world peace or a Vikings playoff run. (Both equally unrealistic.) I ask for the one thing no sane Minnesotan should be wishing for in late November: one more mow.

Does the grass need it? Absolutely not. By November my lawn is about as active as a teenager on Christmas break—motionless, unbothered, and vaguely resentful of any attempt to get it moving. The grass hasn’t needed attention since after Labor Day.

But that’s not important.

What is important is what it means.

When I can mow on my birthday, it means Old Man Winter is still loitering somewhere in northern Canada, probably stuck behind a jackknifed semi. If I can fire up the mower the week of Thanksgiving, maybe it means he’s having trouble clearing Customs. I can picture the agent leaning over the counter, saying “Sir, we need you to declare all forms of precipitation,” which slows things down considerably.

Whatever the holdup, he hasn’t found Minnesota yet. And that final roar of Mr. Briggs & Stratton feels like a tiny but meaningful victory. A personal protest against the inevitable. A whispered message to the cosmos: Not today.

It’s 90 minutes of pretending I don’t live in a state where windshield scrapers are considered “essential equipment,” like insulin pumps or pacemakers.

A birthday mow is my superstition — my own woolly-mammoth warding ritual. Some people knock on wood; I roll a mower over half-frozen turf and pretend November is just late September wearing a coat. It’s ridiculous, and I know it’s ridiculous, but it’s also extremely Minnesotan, which is basically ridiculousness mixed with determination and served in a crockpot.

And this year?

We almost made it.

Right up until Monday night, there was still a faint, foolish glimmer of hope. The lawn was dry. The mower was gassed. I had my gloves ready like a man preparing for a ceremonial event.

The snow did come, but not with the fury we’d been warned about — not the Snowmageddon they’d been breathlessly predicting. Instead, it drifted in quietly, politely, like it didn’t want to interrupt anyone’s Thanksgiving prep.

Overnight, the summer green of our lawns surrendered to a soft, powdery dusting. Not a storm, not a blizzard — just enough to remind us that Old Man Winter had finally found his way home.

This year there will be no wonderfully stubborn satisfaction of pushing a mower across crunchy, near-frozen grass. I’ll miss the neighbors peeking from behind fogged-up windows, holding steaming mugs of something seasonal and whispering, “Is he OK?” and, “Should we call someone?”

While they’re out scraping frost off their windshields and stringing Christmas lights I had hoped to trudge along like it’s mid-June, giving them a friendly wave: Yep, still mowing. Yep, still pretending winter’s not coming.

By now, mowing has nothing to do with lawn care. It’s about hope — thin, improbable, gloriously delusional Minnesotan hope. It’s about tricking yourself, however briefly, into believing the snow might hold off until December, maybe even January if we’re all very, very good this year.

But then the forecast rolled in — that smug little weather map with snowflakes hovering over Minnesota like they owned the place. Old Man Winter finally remembered his itinerary, gathered his storm clouds, and decided to arrive before my birthday. Like a relative who shows up before you’ve vacuumed.

So yes, my hopes and dreams are officially dashed for 2025. The mower goes back into hibernation, tucked away like a bear that doesn’t want to be disturbed until Mother’s Day. Saturday I won’t be mowing — I’ll be standing in the yard, staring at the sky, muttering, “We were this close.”

Still… there’s always next year.

And in Minnesota, hope springs eternal — usually sometime around June, right after we stop scraping ice off our grills.

Mark Glende, Rosemount, is an elementary school custodian. “I write about real-life stories with a slight twist of humor,” he says. “I’m not smart enough to make this stuff up.”

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The worst kept secret in Minnesota is officially out of the bag.

Max Brosmer will officially make the first start of his NFL career when the Vikings play the Seattle Seahawks on Sunday afternoon at Lumen Field. It was the expected outcome considering Brosmer has taken all of the snaps with first team this week in practice while J.J. McCarthy has continued to navigate concussion protocol.

This has been a long time coming for Brosmer since signing with he Vikings as an undrafted free agent in the spring. He steadily made a name for himself in the summer, and has continued to turn heads behind the scenes in the fall.

The fact that McCarthy has struggled to stay healthy made it feel like only a matter of time before Brosmer got his chance. Those injuries include a high ankle sprain, a bruised hand and, most recently, a stint in concussion protocol following last week’s loss at Green Bay.

That doesn’t take into account how much McCarthy has struggled to adapt to the speed of the game at the highest level.

As for Brosmer, he has been the backup for the past month, moving up the depth chart when Carson Wentz (left shoulder) was placed on injured reserve.

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By PATRICK WHITTLE, Associated Press

SCARBOROUGH, Maine (AP) — Eels are the stuff of nightmares — slimy, snakelike creatures that lay millions of eggs before dying so their offspring can return home to rivers and streams. They’ve existed since the time of the dinosaurs, and some species are more poorly understood than those ancient animals.

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Yet they’re also valuable seafood fish that are declining all over the world, leading to a new push for restrictions on trade to help stave off extinction.

Freshwater eels are critically important for the worldwide sushi industry, and some species have declined by more than 90% since the 1980s. The eels have succumbed to a combination of river dams, hydroelectric turbines, pollution, habitat loss, climate change, illegal poaching and overfishing, according to scientists. Some environmental organizations have called for consumers to boycott eel at sushi restaurants.

The loss of eels motivated the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species of Wild Fauna and Flora, or CITES, to consider new restrictions to protect the wriggling fish. The members of CITES, an international treaty, met in Uzbekistan this week to determine if the new rules on trade are needed. Member nations voted against the new protections on Thursday.

Conservation groups said the protections were long overdue, but not everyone was on board. Some fishing groups, seafood industry members and regulatory agencies in the U.S., China and Japan — all countries where eel is economically important — have spoken out against restricting the trade.

The push for more restrictions is the work of “an international body dominated by volunteer scientists and unelected bureaucrats,” said Mitchell Feigenbaum, one of North America’s largest eel dealers and an advocate for the industry. But several conservation groups countered that the protections were needed.

“This measure is vital to strengthen trade monitoring, aid fisheries management, and ensure the species’ long-term survival,” said Susan Lieberman, vice president of international policy for Wildlife Conservation Society.

Why are eels so valuable?

The eels in question are the eels of the anguilla genus, which spend their lives in freshwater but migrate to the ocean to spawn. They are distinct from the familiar, grinning moray eels, which are popular in aquariums and are mostly marine fish, and the electric eels, which live in South America.

Anguilla eels, especially baby eels called elvers, are valuable because they are used as seed stock by Asian aquaculture companies that raise them to maturity for use as food. Freshwater eel is known as unagi in Japan, and it’s a key ingredient in numerous sushi dishes. Eel is also culturally significant in Japan, where people have eaten the fish for thousands of years.

The elvers have become more valuable in the U.S. over the last 15 years because of the steep decline of eels elsewhere in the world. While the population of American eels has fallen, the drop has not been as severe as Japanese and European eels. Attempts to list American eels under the Endangered Species Act in the U.S. have failed.

Maine is the only U.S. state with a significant fishery for the elvers, and it is heavily regulated. Maine’s baby eels were worth more than $1,200 per pound at the docks in 2024, and they were worth more than $2,000 per pound the year before that.

New protections were on the table

CITES, which is one of the world’s largest multinational wildlife agreements, extended protections to European eels in 2009. The organization considered adding more than a dozen more eel species, including the American and Japanese eels, to its list of protected species.

Adding the eels to the list would mean exporters would need a permit to ship them. Before the permit could be granted, a scientific authority in the home country would have to determine that the export would not be detrimental to the species’ survival and that the eels weren’t taken illegally under national wildlife laws. That is significant because poaching of eels is a major threat, and rare species are often illegally passed off as more common ones, CITES documents state.

Tightening trade rules “will encourage species-specific trade monitoring and controls and close loopholes that allow illegal trade to persist,” the documents state.

US, Japan pushed back at protections

Fishing groups are not the only organizations to resist expanding protections for eels, as regulatory groups in some countries have argued that national and regional laws are a better way to conserve eels.

Japan and China have both told CITES that they don’t support listing the eels. And in the U.S., the Atlantic States Marine Fisheries Commission, which regulates the American eel fishery, submitted testimony to CITES opposing the listing.

The U.S.’s own management of eels is sufficient to protect the species, said Toni Kerns, fisheries policy director with the commission.

“We don’t feel that the proposal provides enough information on how the black market would be curbed,” Kerns said. “We are very concerned about how it would potentially restrict trade in the United States.”

A coalition of industry groups in China, Japan, South Korea and Taiwan also submitted a request that the protection be rejected, saying CITES’ assertion that international trade is causing eel populations to decline is “not supported by sufficient evidence.”

Conservationists say the time to act is now

The strong demand for eels is a reason to protect the trade with new rules, said Nastya Timoshyna, office director for Europe with TRAFFIC, a U.K.-based nonprofit that fights wildlife trafficking.

Illegal shipping is not the only reason the eels are in decline, but working with industry to cut down illegal trade will give the fish a better chance at survival, Timoshyna said.

Eels might not be universally beloved, but they’re important in part because they’re an indicator species that helps scientists understand the health of the ecosystem around them, Timoshyna said.

“It’s not about banning it or stopping fishing practices,” Timoshyna said. “It’s about industry being responsible, and there is massive power in industry.”

Associated Press writer Michael Casey in Boston contributed to this report.

By SUSAN HAIGH

HARTFORD, Conn. (AP) — Approximately $3.6 billion in delayed funding for the Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program, or LIHEAP, was released Friday to states and tribes, according to the National Energy Assistance Directors Association.

The federal funding for LIHEAP, which helps millions of low-income households pay to heat and cool their homes, has been held up during the beginning of the cold-weather season because of the federal government shutdown, which ended Nov. 12.

“This release of LIHEAP funding is essential and long overdue,” Mark Wolfe, executive director of NEADA, said in a statement. “Families can finally begin receiving the support they need to keep the heat on as winter begins.”

Mark Bain, who is part of the Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program, sets his thermostat to 65 degrees at his home as he watches his oil levels carefully in hope that he will have enough oil to outlast the shutdown, in Bloomfield, Conn., Monday, Oct. 27, 2025. (AP Photo/Jessica Hill)

States typically receive their allocations at the beginning of November.

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, which oversees the assistance program, has not yet issued a formal public announcement about resumption of the funding. After the federal shutdown ended, HHS said one of its agencies would “work swiftly to administer annual awards,” blaming the delay on congressional Democrats.

Wolfe said state agencies told his organization they’ve received award letters from HHS, enabling them to begin distributing assistance to households.

A message was left seeking comment with HHS.

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On Monday, a bipartisan group of U.S. House members sent a letter to HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. urging him to release the LIHEAP funds by Nov. 30. Given the heating season has already started in many parts of the U.S., they said “there is no time to waste,” especially for households that use home heating oil or propane. Those fuels typically aren’t affected by state moratoriums on utility shutoffs during the winter months.

Roughly 68% of LIHEAP households also receive SNAP food benefits. Wolfe said delays in both programs during the shutdown “put many households in an even more precarious situation than usual.” While Friday’s funding release is welcome news, he said the need for assistance “remains enormous,” especially given rising energy prices. He noted that arrearages remain near record highs.